Thinking Unenslaved

‘LOLcons’ concept created by Jon Swift and named by Marita.

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original photo credit: AP Photo/Charlie Riedel

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‘LOLcons’ concept created by Jon Swift and named by Marita.

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original photo credit: AFP/File/Robyn Beck

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Great. I’ve been “tagged”. Now I feel like a brick wall covered in spray paint. Thanks a lot, Fairlane!

Fairlane, he of the perpetual Kool-Aid over at Jonestown, has bestowed upon me “The Partisan Reflections on Pissant Provocateurs Award”. Isn’t that lovely? I’m not certain, but that might have been one of the words directed at me in Spanish yesterday while I was refereeing a couple of matches in our local men’s league, either before or after I sent off a certain young man with severe self-control issues. So then I get home, fill out all the requisite paperwork on the game, check my email, check on the blog, and here’s Fairlane calling me a pissant. That’s okay, though. I figure it’s a pot-kettle kind of thing.

At any rate, intrigued by the endowment of my very first ever online award thingy, I investigated this long-winded award to figure out why I should be pleased to be called a pissant. It only took me a couple of links, at which point I discovered the source of this interesting little bit of linkology. Great. Now there’s probably someone else I should add to the blogroll.

But back to the pissant thing (which for some odd reason doesn’t spell-check in Firefox), I note from the source:

Let’s get the terminology straight. We are not using the Merriam Webster definition of a pissant. We are instead using the Urban Dictionary’s second definition:

Pissant – Little person blog with big attitude.

Which I think, pretty much covers the entire blogosphere. Recipients should also feel free to substitute, at their discretion, definition 3:

Pissant – Any person who is incapable of consuming as much alcohol as you can. Generally someone who has arrogantly been boasting about how much alcohol they can consume but then falls far short of the trumped up expectations.

Now, I’m completely fine with definition 3 there. When I was very young, my adoptive sister got very frustrated with having to baby-sit a hyperactive adoptive sibling, and she and her boyfriend at the time force-fed me a LOT of Coke and Wild Turkey, which resulted in a multi-day hospitalization with severe alcohol poisoning. (I still think of the bitch quite fondly, really!) So nowadays, I’m fond of telling my friends I can down an entire case of [insert presumably popular beer of choice]. I just don’t tell them it’ll take me a couple of weeks.

Oh, yeah, I was talking about this award thingy.

Anyway, Fairlane has bestowed upon me this award, and now I have to take valuable time away from my client services (okay, i’m actually running some PhotoShop batches on another computer right now) in order to bestow it upon five other unsuspecting bloggers whom I may or may not have taken the time to blogroll yet. According to the Central Insanity, (dammit, someone else I haven’t blogrolled yet!) here is what makes a Pissant Provocateur worthy of the Award:

1. The award recipients are pissants – i.e., they’re not the biggest bloggers in the ‘sphere, they’re not Kos or Hewitt, but their attitudes and proficiencies more than make up for their rankings.

2. They are provocateurs – i.e., they provoke other people into thinking about and responding to subjects they might not otherwise think about and respond to.

3. By virtue of the first two traits, they advance the intrinsic value of a government that is closely, evenly divided between partisans, so no one party has outright control of the outcomes, recognizing that (a) divided government honors the check-and-balance intent of the founding fathers; and (b) divided government tends to work better; reference the Reagan and Clinton years versus the Carter and Bush #43 years.

Like Fairlane, I’m not real sold on the “Reagan and Clinton years” thing, but what do I really care? I gots me an award because I’m specials!

Okay, so for those of you I’m about to tag with this incredibly auspicious award, here are TEH RULZ for your viewing enjoyment:

The Rules of the Partisan Pissant Provocateur Award:

1. Copy and link to this post (meaning these rules and the Award icon).
2. Reflect on five bloggers who cause you to gnash your teeth when reading their posts, but who you nevertheless feel compelled to return to and read time and again. Write a short sincere (or not) paragraph about each one.
3. Make sure you link this post so others can read it and the rules.
4. Go leave your chosen bloggers a comment and let them know they’ve been given the award.
5. Put the award icon on your site.
6. Did I mention you should link this post?

This award should make you reflect on five bloggers who have motivated you to unleash fire breathing partisan posts of your own. Carefully crafted logical arguments and good writing are a bonus but don’t overlook particularly sharp satire, biting snark, or a high octane flamer. Try to keep the quality high, but in a pinch, feel free to substitute your basic journeyman partisan hack.

I’m not certain, but I get the impression that DWSUWF was really just jonesin’ for some linkage, so I hope I’ve satisfied!

Now, on to those whom I think deserve the award!

1. Iron Skunk (formerly ~have skunk~): I’ve been a daily reader of this blog even when he hasn’t posted. A wonderful wit and sharp, effective criticism of things that most definitely deserve to be criticized.
2. A Progressive on the Prairie: Tim, I hope you won’t be offended by this, coming from the realm of snarkery and willful asininity that it does. Tim runs a great blog with extremely insightful perspectives on the world we live in and life in general, as well as very sharp book reviews to which I always refer before purchasing or even checking them out from the library.
3. SD Watch: Todd Epp, a fellow soccer-geek, runs a marvelous blog, which despite his Democratic leanings gives more than a fair shake to our typically overwrought conservative counterparts. If ever there was a worthy pissant (definition 2), it is Todd.
4. Sorghum Crow’s General Store: Crow’s place is one of my favorite blogs to visit, and he is a frequent commentor here. My admiration and appreciation of his online work knows no bounds.
5. Mock, Paper, Scissors: Last but absolutely not least, Tengrain is one of my inspirations and favorite snarkerizers to read. He also produces the most posts of any blog that I read, and his wit bespeaks an insight that is frankly incomparable.

So, heave-ho and have-to, my friends. Thank you, Fairlane!

Yep, you got it, that’s the same memo they disregarded because the intel behind it was from someone in the Clinton administration. Yep, it’s the same memo the terrorist fighters did nothing about. It’s the same memo that Condi tried to brush off reading about in the 9/11 hearings. It’s the memo that shows you just how good they are at protecting this country from outside threats.

read Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein’s “They wish we would all forget” at Monkey Muck.

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pdb blogswarm

…in the Iceberg Lettuce, and she’s gonna look like boiled cabbage.

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editorial note: Alright, so she’s looking like the stronger of the Democratic candidates right now, according to many polls and considerations. I still think that, as great a statement as it would be for us to have a female president, her candidacy is fast becoming a rallying point for the neoconservatives to a degree that may well saddle us with {gag} a ‘President Romney’ or {shudder} a ‘President Giuliani’. Until she wins the Democratic Party nomination, I will continue to cast dispersions Senator Clinton’s way. I do not believe that given the current political climate, she is what this country really needs; and while I appreciate that certain moderate tendencies are beneficial politically, I do not feel that her moderate stances on this fake war and the power it places in the worst presidency in history serve the American public or our Democratic system of government very well at all.

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photo credit: REUTERS/Peter Newcomb

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“Senator Barack Obama attempts to cast ‘Accio’ on Senator Hillary Clinton, who is off-camera. Unfortunately for Barack, Hillary quickly cast ‘Protego’ and went along her way, smirking.”

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photo credit: AFP/Getty Images/File/Joe Raedle

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“all ye who are over-monied, and i will give you breast!”

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(or so we hear from the right-wing pundit-class, that is)

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photo credit: AP Photo/Mary Ann Chastain

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“Senator and presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton reacts favorably to an unwarranted, unsolicited and most certainly unexpected ‘goosing’ from her spouse and former President, Bill Clinton.”

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photo credit: AP Photo/Jeff Gentner

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“…was on display again as Hilary conjured several fireballs in response to the Pentagon’s recent admonishments of her actions.”

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photo credit: AFP/File/Jeff Haynes

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“Former First-Lady Clinton celebrates after receiving a large shipment of Iceberg Lettuce. ‘This is just fabulous,’ Senator Clinton was not reported as saying. ‘Now I won’t be lonely whenever Bill is out getting nookie.’”

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photo credit: Jim Young/Reuters

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“President Bush was visited today by Monica Lewinski, who is now a registered Independent. ‘It’s only fair,’ said Ms. Lewinski. ‘I made a promise to myself that if President Bush made it to a second term, then he’d get the same treatment as President Clinton. And it wasn’t all that bad, anyway. See? No stain!’”

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photo credit: AP Photo/Christophe Ena

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a fat, sweaty Republican pedophile, i find Hillary’s latest attempt to gloss over her voting record and change history to be deeply disturbing.

Arianna Huffington has an excellent article on the issue, from which I excerpt below:

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Instead of honestly explaining her transformation from pro-war supporter to cheerleader of the war’s progress to tentative opponent of the war to her current incarnation as long-term opponent of the war, Hillary skipped right over the unpleasant past and tried to talk only about the future: “Well, you know, Matt, I think the important thing is for the Democrats to be united in trying to either persuade or require this president to change this direction now — that’s what all of us in the Senate are trying to do.” Sure, why answer the question when you can divert attention and blur the differences between you and your opponents?

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what really strikes me about Hillary’s rhetorical spin, in this day and age, is its blatant similarity to the very things that she and other democrats complain about in the current administration: historical revisionism, bald-faced lies, and sidestepping forthright questions with non-answers and evasion. naturally, there’s a level at which all politicians are indeed cut from the same cloth, but is it too Utopian to wish that our Democratic leadership hold themselves to higher standards than those exercised by the people they’re hoping to displace?and how about this word-play from the former president, campaigning for his wife:

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“To characterize Hillary and Obama’s positions on the war as polar opposite is ludicrous. This dichotomy that’s been set up to allow him to become the raging hero of the anti-war crowd on the Internet is just factually inaccurate.”

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indeed, so describing polar opposites as polar opposites is “factually innacurate”. i can no longer discern which administration mimics the other, but isn’t it about time someone—anyone—held themselves to a higher standard? Their respective voting records are quite clear. Obama opposed the war in 2003, and Clinton actively supported it.

 
it’s unfortunate that the great leaders of the past cannot be the great leaders of the present. as Arianna notes, “Repetition does not transform a lie into a truth.” one can only wonder what Franklin Delano Roosevelt would think of the political shenanigans of both parties today, and specifically of Democratic candidates whose actions repeatedly suborn principled behavior in a day and age when moral clarity and ethical thinking could, and should, be the very ideals on which to campaign.

 
Assuming he makes it through the primary, Obama is definitely Commander Other’s candidate of choice.

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photo credits: Senator Clinton: AFP/Getty Images/File/Sandy Huffaker; Senator Obama: AP Photo/Cheryl Senter

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“Senator Clinton meets with a ‘friend’. Meanwhile, former President Clinton was found chewing on the butt of a cigar, videotaping the encounter.”

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photo credit: AP Photo/ John David Mercer

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(unattributed, via Firedoglake)

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“Barak Obama is seen here putting the move on Hillary Clinton, who struggles to maintain composure as Barak’s hand slips higher and higher in an attempt to work out the details of a Barak-Clinton presidential ticket in 2008.”

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(AP Photo/Gary Malerba)

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“John Edwards smiles pretty and says “ya’ll” a lot in an attempt to convince southern voters that he’s still real, and actually has a chance in hell against Obama and Clinton.”

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